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Udurawana Jokes


BOSS
There were three workers - Udurawana, an Italian, and a Jewish who worked together at a factory. Every day they noticed that their boss would leave work a little early.

So one day they meet together and decide they too would leave early that day if the boss left early.

As expected the boss left before closing time and the three of them too left the factory early.

The Jewish guy went home and rests so he can get an
early start.

The Italian guy goes home and cooks dinner.

Udurawana too rushes home. He walks up to his bedroom, opens the door slowly to surprise his wife only to see her in bed with his boss.

He quickly shuts the door and leaves.



The next day the Italian and Jewish guys are talking and plan to go home early again. They ask Udurawana if he too wants to leave early again. Udurawana says that he wouldn't do it again. The others ask him why and he replies,

"Because yesterday I almost got caught!"
Jump
Once a building caught fire and two guys and a Udurawana were trapped in the balcony.

On the ground, fire fighters caught hold of a net and asked them to jump.
The first one jumped but the fire fighters removed the net and he was killed. Then the other guy was asked to jump and again they removed the net too soon and he
was dead.

Seeing all this, Udurawana was furious and said: "You keep the net on the ground and get away from it. I don't trust you.
Suger Level

Oneday Udurawanna's wife noticed that he kept going to the kitchen and always touching the sugar bowl.

He was doing this every few minutes and writing them down.

The wife was curious and asked Udurawanna why he was doing that ?

Udurawanna replied " Darling the doctor told me to keep an eye on the sugar levels regularly".

So I am checking the sugar levels and noting them down !!
Lesbian
Udurawana and his friend are sitting in a bar sipping Black Label Johnny walker when Udurawana noticed a gorgeous blonde sitting by herself in a corner.

As he was getting up to talk to her. Bar Tender said "Hey don't worry about her, She is a lesbian! ".

Udurawana "Lesbian or no lesbian, I get all of them"

Then leaping forward in a very sexy voice he said "Where exactly in Lesbia, are you from?"
Parrot
Udurawana's wife went to a pet shop and immediately spotted a large, beautiful parrot. There was a sign on the cage that said Rs 250. "Why so cheap?" she asked the pet store owner.

The owner looked at her and wispered, "Look, I should tell you first that this bird used to live in a house of prostitution, and sometimes it says some pretty vulgar stuff." 


Mr Udurawana thought about this, but decided she had to have the bird anyway. She took it home and hung the bird's cage up in her living room and waited for it to say something.

The bird looked around the room, then at her, and said, "New house, new madam." The woman was a bit shocked at the implication, but then thought "that's really not so bad." When her two teenage daughters returned from school the bird saw and said, "New house, new madam, new girls." The girls and the woman were a bit offended but then began to laugh about the situation considering how and where the parrot had been raised.

Moments later Udurawana, came home from work. The bird looked at him and said, "New house, new madam, new girls, but same old customer!, Hello Udurawana !"

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