Monday, October 31, 2011

Cost Of Pregnancy !

An 18 year old Italian girl tells her Mom that she has missed her period for 2 months. Very worried, the mother goes
  to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit.


  The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, ‘who was the pig that
  did this to you? I want to know!'


  The girl picks up the phone and makes a call.  Half an hour later, a Ferrari stops in front of their house.

  A mature and distinguished man with gray hair and impeccably dressed in an Armani suit steps out of the of the
  Ferrari and enters the house.

  He sits in the living room with the father, mother, and the girl and tells them: 'Good morning, your daughter has
  informed me of the problem. I can't marry her because of my personal family situation but I'll take charge.

   I will pay all costs and provide for your daughter for the rest of her life.

  Additionally, if a girl is born, I will bequeath a Ferrari, a beach house, 2 retail stores, a townhouse, a
  beachfront villa, and a $2,000,000 bank account.

  If a boy is born, my legacy will be a couple of factories and a $4,000,000 bank account.

  If twins, they will receive a factory and $2,000,000 each.

  However, if there is a miscarriage, what do you suggest I do?'

  At this point, the father, who had remained silent, places a hand firmly on the man's shoulder and tells him, 'You  f..... her again.'

Saturday, October 29, 2011

What I am doing..... Hilarious...

This beautiful woman one day walks into a doctors office and the doctor is bowled over by how stunningly awesome she is. All his professionallism goes right out the window... 


 He tells her to take off her pants, she does, and he starts rubbing her thighs. "Do you know what I am doing?" asks the doctor? "Yes, checking for abnormalities." she replies. 


 He tells her to take off her shirt and bra, she takes them off. The doctor begins rubbing her breasts and asks, "Do you know what I am doing now?", she replies, "Yes, checking for cancer."


 Finally, he tells her to take off her panties, lays her on the table, gets on top of her and starts having sex with her. He says to her, "Do you know what I am doing now?" 


 She replies, "Yes, getting herpies - thats why I am here!"


Sri Lanka's Funniest Emails

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

ටයි මාමේ ඔබ අපේ හිත් වල සදා රැදේ......Tribute to Legendary Titus Thotowatta




‎"....හරියන්නෑ., හරියන්නෑ., ඕක නම් හරියන්නෑ.. කියල හිතෙනකොට මේ ලෝකේ කිසිම දෙයක් බෑයිකියල බෑ කිව්වේ ඔබයි.........!! 
පුංචි අපිව දියරකුස්ගෙන් බේරාගෙන හා හා හරි හාවත් එක්ක කැලේ මැදින් අතරමං නොවී එන්න අපිටපාර පෙන්නපු ගලිවර් ඔබයි........!!
සුට් බුට් එක ...කලිසම් ඇඳලා රෝල්රොයිස් එකේ ගමන් ගියාට නරක වැඩ කරලා සාජන්ට්මහත්තාගෙන් බේරෙන්න බැහැයි කියල අපිට කියල දුන්නේ ඔබයි.........!!
එද... පුංචියට හිටිය ගම්මිරිස් ඇට අද ලොක්කෝ කළේ ඔබයි ටයි මාමේ............!!
ෂෙරිෆ්ලා ගිස්බන්ලා එකතුවෙලා රොබින්හුඩ් මැරුව වෙලාවේ අපි හොඳටම ඇඩුවා......අදවාගේම..................!!
ඔබට තවත් ආයුෂ දෙන්න දොස්තර හොඳහිතටත් බැරිවෙන්න ඇති ටයි මාමේ.....!!
ඒත් ඔෂීන් වගේ ජීවිතය දිනන්න...,
එදා මැප් එක කැප්ටන් ලීච්ගේ අතට නොදී වයිටාත් එක්ක එකතුවෙලා ඔබ අපට බේරලා දුන් නිධානයතාම අපිගාව තියෙනවා ටයි මාමේ...."
ආදරණීය "ටයි මාමේඔබට නිවන් සුව!!!


ඔබ ජීවිතයේ වරක් හෝ ඔහුගේ නිර්මාණ රස විද ඇති නම්  අසාහය නිර්මාණකරුවාට කරනා ගෞරවයක් ලෙස මෙය Froward කරන්න.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Little Jonny - Are you comming......

Johnny walked into class with a black eye

Teacher: what’s wrong?
Johnny : our house is very small. Me, my mom, my dad we sleep on the same bed.
Last night my dad asked, 'Johnny are u sleeping?
When I said No, he slapped my face and gave me a black eye
Teacher: the next time when your dad asks if you're sleeping , keep dead quiet and don’t answer

The following morning Johnny comes back with a much worse black eye again...


Teacher: My goodness why the black eye again?
Johnny: Dad asked me again, Johnny are you sleeping? And I shut up n kept dead still.
Then my dad and my mom started moving, You know at the same time Mom was breathing erratically,
Kicking her legs up frantically and squealing like a hyena on the bed.
Then my dad asked my mom, are you coming?
Mom said: Yes I’m coming, are u coming too?
Dad answered: Yes !!!
They don’t usually go anywhere without me
So I said,
wait for me, I'm also coming... !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !